A War Without Roses
by Chibi J
Summary: Complete Things are getting a little crazy lately, especially in battle. This is a silly comedy, something made rather randomly. But give it a chance, you may have some fun!


A WAR WITHOUT ROSES  
  
By Chibi J  
  
Um, I started this at 2:30 PM and finished it at 6:30 PM while watching Moulin Rouge and The Simpsons. I was quite bored until Moulin Rouge came on, so when it did (around page three) I was torn. Needless to say, I was running back and forth from the TV to the computer. So it may not be my best work.  
  
This was self-edited, because I have Sailor Sista editing something else right now and I don't want to keep bogging her down. So if you see a mistake, let me know so I can fix it.  
  
Um...I don't own Sailor Moon. If I did, they would take it away from me because I'm certifiable.   
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"One! Two! Three! Four! Five! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT!" The crowd chanted on, encouraging a young blonde with pigtails on.  
  
'Just two more. I can do it. I'll prove them all wrong!' Usagi thought in her mind as she struggled to continue.  
  
"NINE!"  
  
The internal struggle continued as Usagi strived to finish the task at hand. No one believed that she could do it, but she would show them.  
  
"Odango-baka, you can't do it! Just give up."  
  
Usagi shot Rei a look that screamed "SHUT UP!" before returning to the challenge.  
  
"TEN!!!" The crowd shouted and cheers were heard throughout the arcade. The petite blonde had managed to catch the attention of everyone in the arcade. Even the brooding dark hair college student, who sat in the back booth away from the excitement, had to give the girl a small smile. 'She really is multi-talented.' He thought to himself.   
  
The crowd silenced as Rei raised her hand into the air. "That's all well and good Usagi, but what about the second half of the challenge?"  
  
Usagi looked at Rei smugly, but internally groaned. She swallowed hard and the audible gulp once again sent everyone into a tizzy. Taking a few swallows of fresh air before raising her head and beaming Rei with her bright smile.  
  
"Ugh!" Rei groaned and turned away from the gloating girl.  
  
"Usagi, I don't think that's very good for you. Don't do it again please." A girl, slightly smaller than Usagi with short blue hair, pleaded.  
  
"Don't worry Ami, I do it all the time." Usagi said with a smile.  
  
"How did you learn to do that in the first place Usa?" Makoto, an extremely tall girl with brown hair pulled into a ponytail, asked.  
  
"Practice."  
  
"PRACTICE!" Two girls yelled together. One was Makoto and the other was Minako, a girl that could easily pass as Usagi's twin (except for the hairstyle).  
  
"Is that so hard to believe?" Usagi asked with a frown.  
  
"Not from an Odango Atama like you." Usagi turned to growl at the man from which the voice came. It was the previously brooding college student.  
  
"Mamoru-baka." Usagi snarled as the name rolled off her lips. "No one asked you for your opinion."  
  
"Gomen, I was just so impressed by your ability to swallow 10 marshmallows in one gulp that I couldn't help but to congratulate you." His smile/smirk confused Usagi. So many times he had insulted her at the same time as congratulating her that she could no longer distinguish between earnest intentions and sarcasm.  
  
"Go away BAKA! I don't need to hear anything from you." She had decided to go with the safe ground and simply turn him away. This spared any embarrassment she might have know if he was only teasing her.  
  
Mamoru, however, simply shrugged his shoulders. To the outside world, it appeared that he could have cared less. Internally, he felt bad that he couldn't just have fun teasing her like everyone else. Rei did it all the time and the two girls were best friends. But whenever he teased her, she took it terribly, and he was never to know the sunny girl's friendship.  
  
"Later." He mumbled and turned away, making his way out of the arcade.  
  
"Mamoru." Usagi whispered under her breath. Not even her friends who were standing right next to her had heard her. She shrugged her shoulders and turned to beam a smile at Motoki while asking him for a large glass of water. Her throat was dried out from swallowing so many marshmallows. It was a time for fun; she would worry about Mamoru later.  
  
~*~  
  
Sighing as he began to walk down the street, Mamoru stopped and allowed himself one last glance back into the arcade at the blonde vision. Her face was scrunched up in confusion, as if trying to understand a really hard math problem. He thought she was adorable.  
  
Ah-Cho!  
  
"Bless you." A random person walking by said after Mamoru's near explosive sneeze.  
  
"Arigato." He thanked the man for his kindness and began to walk again. It was odd, the sneeze. It was as if he were becoming sick, yet he didn't feel ill. He didn't have any allergies either.  
  
~*~  
  
Ah-Cho! Usagi sneezed.  
  
"Bless you." Several of her friends said at once.   
  
"Are you coming down with something Usagi?" Ami asked, always looking out for the welfare of her friends.  
  
"I don't think so. Perhaps I should go home and rest." Usagi said, wondering if she was catching a cold.  
  
"That's probably for the best. After all, what would we do if our leader was sick?" Makoto said in a low voice, so only her fellow Senshi could hear her. The five girls, Usagi, Rei, Ami, Makoto, and Minako, were the Sailor Senshi, the famed protectors of Tokyo. When random monsters attacked the city, they were there to protect it.  
  
"I suppose you're right. I'll see you later." Usagi stated as she left the arcade. Without thinking, she turned to the left and began to walk.   
  
"I thought Usa's house was that way." Minako said to herself, looking down the right path outside the arcade. She shrugged her shoulders and put the thought out of her mind.  
  
~*~  
  
Ah-Cho! Ah-Cho! Mamoru could not stop sneezing. His eyes were watering and his nose was starting to stuff up. It was as if he was suffering from hay fever, even though it was the middle of winter. His nose started to drain into his throat (disgusting, I know), causing him to cough as well as sneeze.  
  
Deciding that he could trudge his weary body no further, he sat on a bench in the park. He could see his apartment building only a block away, but his head felt as if it would explode and that he would never make it. He was still sneezing when a sound brought him out of wandering thoughts.  
  
Ah-Cho! Ah-Cho! Usagi's small sneezes were echoing out of the park. Her mind was flustered and confused. She knew the park and knew that she knew how to get home from it. Yet the sneezes, cough, and runny nose were clouding her brain and judgment.  
  
"Bless you. Ah-Cho!"  
  
"Ah-Cho! Bless you too." Usagi replied to the voice. She didn't even look to the speaker, only sat down beside him. She knew it was a he by the depth of his voice.  
  
"Ah-Cho! Thank you." Suddenly it clicked in her brain. She knew that voice and looked up to see the speaker.  
  
"Mamoru-Ah-Cho-baka?" She asked, sniffling.  
  
"Odango-Cho-Atama?" He replied just as poorly.  
  
"When did you get a cold?" She asked him between coughs and sneezes. He seemed perfectly fine when he had been harassing her inside the arcade.  
  
"I don't know. I started all this when I left after your amazing display of talent. You?" He asked. She sensed that he truly wasn't teasing her and decided to be equally honest.  
  
"Same for me. Weird." They sat in silence for sometime after that, or as silent as two people who sound like they are on their deathbed can be. The continual sneezes and coughs seemed to catch the attention of passer-bys, who attempted to avoid the two like the plague.  
  
"Um, Usagi," Mamoru started, startling her with the use of her real name, "Would you like to go to my place for some soup? I only live in that building over there." He asked, while indicating the apartment building a block away.  
  
"That sounds nice Mamoru." Usagi agreed, impressed at his politeness. 'It's probably the cold.' She thought to herself.  
  
The two tried to stand from the bench, but a wave of dizziness caught them both. Usagi grasped out for the nearest thing to steady herself on and Mamoru did the same. Ironically, they both grabbed on to each other's arms, bringing their bodies within an inch of each other.  
  
The sneezing fit stopped and both felt a wave of health flow over them. Mamoru looked down to the girl he held in his arms and took in her beauty. She was gorgeous. He couldn't help but lower his head down to her level.  
  
Usagi looked up to Mamoru and saw his face quickly approaching her own. His attractive features up close revealed him to be devilishly handsome, a fact that she had long ago admitted. Her eyes closed gently as his lips descended to hers.  
  
As their lips met, the air above them and the ground below them quaked and grumbled. It was as if the kiss were to shatter the world completely.   
  
Mamoru pulled back gently, afraid to open his eyes only to find it a dream. "Usagi." He whispered her name across her lips, causing her eyes to flutter open. Both pairs of eyes, midnight and sky blue, were clouded.  
  
"Mamoru." She whispered back. Perhaps their lips would have met, had they not been so rudely interrupted.  
  
"MWHAHAHAHA!" An evil sounding voice cackled from behind them. "You have fallen victim to my spell of love. You are mine now."  
  
Both Mamoru and Usagi twisted towards the voice, to be confronted by an eight foot pink fluffy bunny with large muscles and sharp teeth.  
  
"Usagi?" Mamoru was questioning her, hoping that she understood his unspoken question 'what the hell is that'. Yet the response he got was not what he expected.  
  
"Yes?" The large pink bunny responded.  
  
"Oh God! That's my name, not yours!" Usagi, the blonde, replied, completely disgusted. In her protest, she pushed herself away from Mamoru to glare at the disfigured bunny, effectively breaking the trance that the two had found themselves in.  
  
"Wait...did you say love?" Usagi asked, um...usagi.   
  
"That's right! No one can escape my spell of love! Mwhahahahaha!" The bunny jumped in glee, proud of the sheer genius of the plan.  
  
"LOVE!!??" Both Usagi and Mamoru shouted. They turned to look at each other and then back at the gross rabbit.  
  
"I don't love him! That's ridiculous!" She shouted. Again, she opened to her mouth to yell about the entire concept of loving Mamoru, only to have a serious of sneezes come out instead.  
  
"I agree. The notion is...well it's..." His loud sneeze cut off his protest. Immediately he felt as he had moments before he kissed Usagi.   
  
Usagi, through her coughing fit, realized that she needed to get this oversized bunny moon dusted and fast. However, to transform in front of Mamoru would reveal more than she was ready to face with him.   
  
Reaching for her communicator on her wrist, she was startled to find it missing. 'Damn it all to hell!' she cursed internally. The other senshi would fry her for losing it. Not only that, but she now had no choice but to transform.  
  
She turned to face Mamoru, to find him fighting his own internal battle. He seemed just as concerned about something. Little did she know, at the time, he was fighting the same argument in his head.  
  
Without another thought, Usagi grabbed her broach off of her school uniform and held it into the air. With a few words that Mamoru couldn't quite catch, she was enveloped in a bright white light. A twirl or two was visible to Mamoru, yet he couldn't see entirely what was happening, though he had a vague idea.  
  
When the light faded, Sailor Moon was facing...Tuxedo Kamen?  
  
"Tuxedo Kamen-sama?" She questioned, wondering briefly where Mamoru had gone. Then her masked hero sneezed. "MAMORU!" She shouted in disbelieve.  
  
"Hai, Sailor Odango." He replied with a smirk. 'Great, now he can tease me more often!' Usagi grumbled in her head.  
  
"Look...cho...let's just...ah-cho...get rid of this...cho...thing!" She spluttered out, becoming more and more angry with the man standing before her.  
  
He seemed equally upset, though his sneezes and coughs prevented any words to escape his mouth.  
  
Usagi, fed up with the whole situation, ripped her tiara off of her head and aimed it at the rabbit. She flung it out, only to sneeze as it left her hands, veering far off course and hitting a nearby tree.  
  
"Nice try." Mamoru replied sarcastically. He took his aim and pulled his arm back, where a rose would appear, and flung it forward. However, instead of a rose, a small purple pansy floated down a foot in front of him.   
  
Usagi practically rolled over in laughter. Mamoru was determined to impresses the foolish girl and tried again. This time, a more deadly weapon was thrown, a baseball. Although it had speed behind it, the bunny simply caught it.  
  
Trying to stifle her laughter, only to end up in a coughing fit, Usagi took in Mamoru's dejected form. She felt terrible for him and wanted to make him feel better. She stood up, her coughing past, and decided to cheer him on.  
  
"Come on Tuxedo Kamen-sama! You can do it!" She shouted with a large smile. But his fierce look in her direction made her rethink her action. Why did she ever feel like she wanted to help him? "Baka," she mumbled before reaching for her tiara. With her thoughts centered on the egotistical dark haired college student, her aim again suffered, as did her body. Her "cold" attacked again without mercy, leaving her again defenseless.  
  
Mamoru frowned. Only Usagi would tease him so and then put herself in a position where she needed protection. Willing a rose to his hands again, he instead threw a rocking chair, which crashed and splintered in front of the bunny.  
  
"Face it! You cannot defeat me! Mwhahahaha!" The pink beast tormented the two heroes, both of whom could not reply due to coughing, sneezing, and wheezing.  
  
Usagi looked up in time to see Mamoru throw the rocking chair. The pink bunny was laughing at her hero. Yet it was here that the bunny began to advance on.   
  
Not allowing injury to Sailor Moon, Tuxedo Kamen once again tried to fire out his attack. Time after time he tried, yet the strangest items flew from his hands. The butterflies were by far the prettiest, yet the most awkward was the kitchen sink. Giving up, he dropped to his knees in defeat.  
  
Watching from the ground where she lay, Usagi saw him desperately try to attack the wicked rabbit, with no avail. Her heart sank. She would die before ever telling him her true feelings. "No! That won't happen!" She shouted, rising to her feet. Her tiara, with her renewed resolve, cut its way through the air and into her opponent.  
  
The bunny stumbled a little, having been hit for the first time throughout the entire battle. But he was not one to give up so easily. He lifted his hands in front of him and fired off an attack that resembled a Pep marshmallow. (AN: you know, the little marshmallow bunnies you eat at Easter that taste way to sugary?)   
  
Usagi dodged the first, second, third, and forth. But when the fifth came, she stumbled and knew that she would not be able to get out of the path in time. She closed her eyes in fear when a pair of strong arms grabbed her around her waist to pull her away in time.  
  
"Tuxedo Kamen?" She questioned her hero, who lay above her. He was breathing hard and he was trying to refrain from coughing in her face. She then realized that she was no longer in the same situation. Once again, she felt perfectly healthy. Her mind swam as she tried to analyze the situation.  
  
"Are you okay Odango?" He asked. He was concerned, but some habits were hard to break. Yet her face didn't react at his teasing. This really had him worried. "Usagi?" He asked, his face moving closer to hers. His coughing ceased.  
  
"Mamoru." Usagi responded with a slightly husky voice. Not wasting another moment, she reached up and pulled him down, her lips meeting his. All noise was drowned out from the background as the two became involved in only each other.  
  
The evil pink bunny was standing by watching the two. It sighed.  
  
Mamoru broke away from Usagi and looked deep into her eyes. There he saw everything he had always wanted, her love. "Usagi, Odango Atama, I love you." He whispered gently to her.  
  
"Mamoru, I...I love you too." She whispered back, encircling her arms around his neck and hugging him.  
  
"Ah-hem." The bunny cleared its throat behind them. "If you two don't mind, I do have a schedule here." He said as he tapped his foot.  
  
The hug ended and Usagi and Mamoru looked at the bunny confused. Looking back to each other and sharing a glance, they stood up.  
  
"If it's a fight you want..." Usagi started.  
  
"Then it's a fight you get." Mamoru finished.  
  
She pulled her tiara from her head and he reached back to produce a rose as the bunny advanced. The two attacks fired off at the same time. The rose embedded itself in the rabbits heart, while the tiara struck in the same spot only a second later.  
  
The giant pink bunny was unable to withstand the attack and crumbled to dust on the grass.  
  
Mamoru turned to Usagi, who was transformed back to normal. He looked down to find that her release had allowed him to resume his normal attire as well.  
  
"I wouldn't have guessed." He stuttered out.   
  
Usagi looked at him questioningly. "What, that I'm Sailor Moon?"  
  
"No." He started as he approached her. Taking her hand into his own, he leaned down towards her ear. "That you would ever love me as much as I love you."  
  
She inhaled sharply, moved by the gentleness and sincerity of his words. Any words she may have attempted to say were cut off as his lips once again met hers.  
  
~*~  
  
"Told you." Minako said smugly to her fellow senshi, spinning a pink communicator around in her hand. "I told you I could do it."  
  
Rei looked at her and rolled her eyes. "Okay, stop gloating. You met your challenge."   
  
"Okay, so Usagi ate 10 marshmallows in one swallow, Minako made Usagi and Mamoru admit their true feelings, Makoto flipped 200 pancakes in 20 seconds." Ami recounted the events that had happened so far that day. "Well Rei, that leaves you and I."  
  
Rei looked at the small blue hair girl and sighed. "Well," she turned to the other girls, "which would you rather see: a river on fire or the world's largest slushy?"  
  
Makoto shrugged, not sure which would be more fun, while Minako started jumping up and down beside her. "Slushy! I'm hungry!"  
  
And the four girls walked away from the two lovers that were making out on the park grass near a pile of pink ash, which smelled remarkably like a pixie stick, to head for the Eiffel Tower, which Minako assured would make an excellent cone once turned over.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sorry all, I was just really bored and needed a release.  
  
ChibiJ77@yahoo.com 


End file.
